1stclasspussy:

too much porn on my dash not enough quotes from the bible 

nosdrinker:

write my url on your ass and submit it to me

e102gamma:

texting bitches at 11:12 and making their wishes come true

dysphorism:

statics:

i swallowed your cum you can text me first

omg

(Source: svicide)

breakfastatbequiettiffany:

ricksanscrotum:

saying that evolution is a theory and it hasn’t really been proven yet is sort of like saying gravity is a theory and it hasn’t really been proven yet

Objects fall because they refuse to raise themselves up to the power of Christ 

grrrlfever:

Cosmo sex tip #394: Once your man reaches orgasm, awkwardly embrace him and whisper “well done Draco.”

foxnewsofficial:

sext: i cover my body in unfinished math problems and you seductively work your way up, they are very complicated, it takes hours

(Source: foxnewsofficial)